Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Why Liles Should be Traded

Liles should be traded for his embarrassing off-ice performance. Actually, lack of performance.
Seriously, when has this guy ever made a trip to Puckbunnistan for the benefit of the fans?
Every female Avalanche fan in Avs-nation will tell you how hot he is. They’ll tell you his nick name in Johnny Hot-Pocket with a twinkle in their eye that morphs into a far-away stare as they fantasize….ok…you can finish that part.
Why didn’t he ever date Lindsey Vonn?

Clearly the Lacroix -illuminati have a secret plan in place. Marketing via puckbunnnies. You see it in place all over the sports world. The NBA with Khloe Kardashian and Eva Longoria. The NFL with Kendra of Playboy fame, though she didn’t pick the most talented player, but I guess she is playing down to her level. Rihanna for the bat boys.
Now in the NHL we have Carrie Underwood, Hillary Duff…and in Denver?…zippo. Nadda. A big zero.
The Avalanche marketing department has clearly been counting on Liles to pick up the slack, can you blame them? With no budget and the creativity to match, they quickly signed on with the illuminati.
As I mentioned before, Liles has done his job on the ice. It’s the marketing memo that he ignored that is going to be his undoing.
What about those Colorado twins that were in Playboy? Natalie and Jennifer Campbell?

That would be something to talk about!
On the ice he has battled the belief that he won’t go to the tough parts of the ice. Off the ice it’s obvious. Look, no one wants to date, let alone marry Heidi Montag. I’m pretty sure Spencer just failed to read the fine print of that Hills contract. But at some point you gotta take one for the team, Liles. Heidi Montag, while based in the hills of Hollywood, is a Colorado native and would surely have provided some entertaining, though painful, moments.
They could have done an off-season reality show, though that would never be enough attention for her.
Well, a compelling case for the trade of Liles, if ever there was one!


  1. Haha nice! You need to update the Heidi picture with the more plastic/zombie-like ones after her most recent run in with the knife. I grew up with her haha, sad day.

  2. Really? Well you missed your chance for fame, eh?
    I was going to look for a real Frankenstein pic of her but I thought this one was pretty funny!